During a keynote speech at a mental health conference in Australia, Prince Harry said there were points in his life when he did not want to be royal or to fulfil the duties his title entails, particularly after the death of his mother, Princess Diana, when he was 12 years old.
“I was like, ‘I don’t want this job. I don’t want this role — wherever this is headed, I don’t like it,’ he told the audience at the InterEdge Summit — a leadership summit on workplace mental health — in Melbourne on Thursday, where his wife, Meghan Markle, was also present.
During his 20-minute address, Harry spoke about his experience with mental health and how grief has impacted his life.
“When I was invited to speak at this summit, I wasn’t sure whether I was expected to speak as someone who, despite everything, has their s–t together. Or as someone who, despite what it may look like, actually doesn’t have his s–t together,” he said.
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“But I was struck by something quite simple — that while my experiences may be unusual, the feelings that come with them are not,” Harry continued, before speaking about the death of his mother and how losing her made him feel alienated from his royal identity.
“In my experience, loss is disorienting at any age,” he said. “Grief does not disappear because we ignore it. Experiencing that as a kid while in a goldfish bowl under constant surveillance, yes, that will have its challenges. And without purpose, it can break you,” he went on.
“There have been many times when I’ve felt overwhelmed. Times when I’ve felt lost, betrayed, or completely powerless. Times when the pressure — externally and internally — felt constant. And times when, despite everything going on, I still had to show up pretending everything was OK, so as not to let anyone down.”
“For many years I was numb to it, and perhaps that was easier then, but I also didn’t yet have the tools to deal with it,” he added, suggesting that the lifestyle “killed his mom,” which in turn turned him against the idea of abiding by it.
Eventually, he realized he could use his platform to advocate for people who struggle, Harry said.
“And also, what would my mom want me to do? And that really changed my own perspective,” he added.
He credited two military tours in Afghanistan with helping him build resilience and the capacity to face his psychological struggles, as well as becoming a husband and a father to Archie, six, and Lilibet, four.
“When a parent is overwhelmed, children feel it. When someone is supported, families feel it,” the prince said.
“For me, one of the biggest shifts came when I realized that asking for help isn’t a weakness. It’s very much a form of strength.”
His speech came less than a week after a charity Harry co-founded to help young people with HIV and AIDS in Lesotho and Botswana, created in honour of Princess Diana, sued him for libel.
The prince, who quit the charity in 2025 following a high-profile dispute after a public falling out with its chair of the board, Sophie Chandauka, co-founded the organization with his friend, Prince Seeiso of Lesotho, in 2006.
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